Tuesday, January 02, 2007
She’s trying to kill me…
With heart attacks, at least!
Michelle has been giving me the horror movie heebie jeebies lately. We’ve both been under the weather and have been dosing up with NyQuil, the nighttime sniffling, sneezing, coughing, aching, stuffy head, fever so you can rest medicine. It’s been having strange effects on her.
This has been a three night process of which I’m sure is ultimately leading to that pivotal moment where she scares me to death.
Night One – Bedtime
I am reading; Michelle has fallen asleep. I decide that it’s time to turn off the light, but as I do I’m hit with the sudden urge to go to the bathroom. I get up in the dark and round our bed to make way to the ensuite bathroom.
“Stop!”
I look down at Michelle and can just make out her face in the darkness. Her eyes are wide open and staring at the ceiling. She points at the spot she’s staring at and says, “There something on the ceiling!”
I look and can’t see anything.
“It’s flying,” she insists, “It’s like a dragon fly!”
I look harder and can’t see a thing. I look back at Michelle who’s now asleep again. I manage to slow my heart beat and make my way back to the bathroom.
Once I’ve made it back to the bed, Michelle says, “How many lights are on the wall?”
I had no idea what she was referring to, so I said, “Seven!”
She replied, “I see three!” I glance at her and realize that she’s looking towards the ensuite light switch which glows when it is in the off position. However, there is only one light.
She was quiet for a while and said something that I can’t recall a few minutes later. But the worst was when, about a half hour later, she sat bolt upright and stared at our darkened doorway without so much as saying a word.
After a few minutes I asked her what she was looking at. She said, almost angrily, “Nothing!” and went back to sleep. I’m sure it was a long while before I was able to do the same.
Night Two – Bedtime
I had just finished reading and switched off the light when Michelle, who had been sleeping, sits up and leans over me to look at our window.
“Why’s it hanging from the window?”
I look at the window, see nothing, and tell Michelle as such.
“You hung the cell phone from the window!”
Actually, I’m pretty sure I didn’t…
She was asleep before I could tell her so.
Night Three – Bedtime
This was last night. Once again, I am reading while she sleeps. She sits up again, looks at the ensuite door (which is closed) then turns to look at me.
“There’s a splash of red on the door!” she whispers.
I’m kind of buggin’ out at this point. I look at the door and, of course, see nothing.
“You’re trying to kill me, aren’t you?” I asked her.
“I think the dog did it!” She looks at Lilly who is innocently sleeping at the foot of the bed. “She put the red there!”
She goes back to sleep.
“You are, aren’t you? You’re trying to give me a heart attack!”
She didn’t even respond.
Later, though, she asked me how much. I was pretty much in pain last night due to an all day Chinook induced headache, so I just blurted out, “500!”
“I thought it was 63,” she said.
“Why?” I asked.
“It just looked like 68,” she responded.
“I thought you just said 63?”
“Yeah!”
“Why?”
“It just computes,” she said, “It just makes sense.”
I thought for a moment.
“We’re having you committed in the morning!”
All she did was snore.
I wasn’t kidding about the Chinook induced headache. I’ve been told that it has to do with the extreme pressure difference when the Chinook winds come about. Yesterday there was a beautiful Chinook wind which practically melted all the snow. Lilly and I went for a nice long walk while I did my best to ignore the nagging headache. Well, it kept me up till 3:30 am, and when my cold and head wouldn’t cooperate with me at all, I phoned in sick. Great, eh? First day back for the New Year and I’m incapacitated.
Ugh!
I need Tylenol!
Michelle has been giving me the horror movie heebie jeebies lately. We’ve both been under the weather and have been dosing up with NyQuil, the nighttime sniffling, sneezing, coughing, aching, stuffy head, fever so you can rest medicine. It’s been having strange effects on her.
This has been a three night process of which I’m sure is ultimately leading to that pivotal moment where she scares me to death.
Night One – Bedtime
I am reading; Michelle has fallen asleep. I decide that it’s time to turn off the light, but as I do I’m hit with the sudden urge to go to the bathroom. I get up in the dark and round our bed to make way to the ensuite bathroom.
“Stop!”
I look down at Michelle and can just make out her face in the darkness. Her eyes are wide open and staring at the ceiling. She points at the spot she’s staring at and says, “There something on the ceiling!”
I look and can’t see anything.
“It’s flying,” she insists, “It’s like a dragon fly!”
I look harder and can’t see a thing. I look back at Michelle who’s now asleep again. I manage to slow my heart beat and make my way back to the bathroom.
Once I’ve made it back to the bed, Michelle says, “How many lights are on the wall?”
I had no idea what she was referring to, so I said, “Seven!”
She replied, “I see three!” I glance at her and realize that she’s looking towards the ensuite light switch which glows when it is in the off position. However, there is only one light.
She was quiet for a while and said something that I can’t recall a few minutes later. But the worst was when, about a half hour later, she sat bolt upright and stared at our darkened doorway without so much as saying a word.
After a few minutes I asked her what she was looking at. She said, almost angrily, “Nothing!” and went back to sleep. I’m sure it was a long while before I was able to do the same.
Night Two – Bedtime
I had just finished reading and switched off the light when Michelle, who had been sleeping, sits up and leans over me to look at our window.
“Why’s it hanging from the window?”
I look at the window, see nothing, and tell Michelle as such.
“You hung the cell phone from the window!”
Actually, I’m pretty sure I didn’t…
She was asleep before I could tell her so.
Night Three – Bedtime
This was last night. Once again, I am reading while she sleeps. She sits up again, looks at the ensuite door (which is closed) then turns to look at me.
“There’s a splash of red on the door!” she whispers.
I’m kind of buggin’ out at this point. I look at the door and, of course, see nothing.
“You’re trying to kill me, aren’t you?” I asked her.
“I think the dog did it!” She looks at Lilly who is innocently sleeping at the foot of the bed. “She put the red there!”
She goes back to sleep.
“You are, aren’t you? You’re trying to give me a heart attack!”
She didn’t even respond.
Later, though, she asked me how much. I was pretty much in pain last night due to an all day Chinook induced headache, so I just blurted out, “500!”
“I thought it was 63,” she said.
“Why?” I asked.
“It just looked like 68,” she responded.
“I thought you just said 63?”
“Yeah!”
“Why?”
“It just computes,” she said, “It just makes sense.”
I thought for a moment.
“We’re having you committed in the morning!”
All she did was snore.
I wasn’t kidding about the Chinook induced headache. I’ve been told that it has to do with the extreme pressure difference when the Chinook winds come about. Yesterday there was a beautiful Chinook wind which practically melted all the snow. Lilly and I went for a nice long walk while I did my best to ignore the nagging headache. Well, it kept me up till 3:30 am, and when my cold and head wouldn’t cooperate with me at all, I phoned in sick. Great, eh? First day back for the New Year and I’m incapacitated.
Ugh!
I need Tylenol!
