...but I saw someone else today. It just happened so fast. I didn't really expect it to go anywhere. Honest!

I just walked by and saw her through the glass in the door. I went in and said those two sweet little words, "How much?"

"Five bucks!" she responded, and I said let's do it.

She sat me down, and minutes after the buzzing started, my sparsely growing frock was gone. Um, then she rinsed me off. That was a nice feature!

I had to do it. My stupid hair is growing in so weirdly on my, um, crown that any growth up there just angers me. I want everyone to know that that was the first person to ever lay hands on my scalp other than Michelle since Kathi cut my hair for my wedding.

There! I feel liberated! I got it off my chest, and everything is fine. We'll work through this, Michelle, right? I gotta wear more hats!